All the BMW not-coupes with the word "coupe" in their name are turning into Chevy Malibus

"Textured Soy Protein" (texturedsoyprotein) 01/16/2020 at 16:02 • Filed to: None

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This is the current generation Chevy Malibu. It’s an unremarkable midsize sedan you’ve probably encountered at some point as a rental car. It has a mildly distinctive shape to its C-pillar quarter window that BMW has become quite fond of.

Generally speaking, the only BMWs with C-pillar quarter windows had been SUVs, but starting with the F36 4-series Gran Coupe, several other BMW models have gained C-pillar quarter windows. But the F36 rear quarter window is a fairly typical example of the !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! and thus, not a Chevy Malibu.

But, not long after the debut of the F36, along came the (short lived in the USA at least) G32 6-series Gran Turismo, which based on nothing other than the gener al shape of its C-pillar quarter windows, is a Chevy Malibu.

And now, the X4 & X6 (which BMW claims are “Sports Activity Coupes”) , and 2-series Gran Coupe have all become Chevy Malibus.

The 8-series Gran Coupe lacks a C-pillar quarter window, but its back door windows are shaped somewhat more like a Chevy Malibu than a Hofmeister kink.

L est ye think that this replacement of Hofmeister kinks with Chevy Malibus will be confined to C-pillar quarter window-equipped not-coupes with “coupe” in their names, well, check out the concept version of the upcoming new 4-series that actually is a coupe.

That right there is pure, unadulterated Chevy Malibu. Hey GM, why don’t you protect your intellectual property better? 

For Sweden > Textured Soy Protein 01/16/2020 at 16:07

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Those are Accords

SBA Thanks You For All The Fish > Textured Soy Protein 01/16/2020 at 16:08

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If you want to be depressed about the “convergence to Meh!” trend in design... Line up photos of those Jellybean CUVs next to each other. I defy anybody (short of cheating and looking at badges) to tell a German from Japanese from Korean from US variation i n the sad, sullen category.

Ash78, voting early and often > Textured Soy Protein 01/16/2020 at 16:10

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I submit that they are all just becoming the Mercedes CLS — the VW CC, Audi A7, BMW Gran Coupes, Tesla model S, Chevy Malibu, Honda Accord and the Audi A5 Sportback (in chronological order, more or less)

It’s a nice look, even on the Malibu, but it’s a weird combination of compromises unless you’re just in it for the aesthetics.

Who is the Leader - 404 / Blog No Longer Available > For Sweden 01/16/2020 at 16:14

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Considering the accord is still a better car, yes. One day those coupes will fall into my price range.

Tripper > Textured Soy Protein 01/16/2020 at 16:18

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All the BMW not-coupes with the word “ coupe” in the title:

Textured Soy Protein > Ash78, voting early and often 01/16/2020 at 16:25

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Many of these 4 door coupe like objects ape the CLS’ overall proportions, but this C-pillar  shape is pure Chevy Malibu.

Deal Killer - Powered by Focus > For Sweden 01/16/2020 at 16:29

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I’ve never been a “stanced” kind of guy, but that car right there needs to be about 2" lower.

fintail > Textured Soy Protein 01/16/2020 at 16:42

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Car designers, is there anything they can do? Especially for mainstream stuff.

That 8er GC also has a healthy dose of Stinger in my eyes (and Stinger has a healthy dose of 2011 Optima).  What comes around goes around, I guess.

Textured Soy Protein > Deal Killer - Powered by Focus 01/16/2020 at 16:53

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Lowering a car is not stancing it. Exhibit A: my car.

Ash78, voting early and often > Textured Soy Protein 01/16/2020 at 16:54

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Now that I look back over it, yes....I always took it for granted because the car I drove for the longest of any — the ‘98 Passat (see below, not mine) — had a rear quarter window that was truly separate from the door. Very much like what you’re describing here, and definitely different than most of the 3-boxed sedans of the late 90s, which almost all included the tiny window as part of the door . This arched roof (along with the Audi A6 and partly the A4) became the proto-designs for most sedans for the past 20 years, up until these newer quasi-coupes became the norm for so many companies.

Textured Soy Protein > Ash78, voting early and often 01/16/2020 at 17:15

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Plenty of sedans with rear quarter windows predate the B5 Passat. For example:

But this isn’t about BMW adding quarter windows. What I’m talking about specifically is the shape of the Malibu quarter window vs BMW’s traditional Hofmeister kink for its C-pillars.

A rear window with a Hofmeister kink has 3 corners.

Although starting in the late 90s that corner A has been increasingly vestigal and more part of the overall curve of the roofline.

Regardless of whether A is actually a corner, C is always forward of B. The bottom of the window is a continuous line until it gets to C, and then it kicks up and back to B.

With the Malibu and its BMW imitators, C is the farthest-back corner, not B. And while the Malibu continues the diagonal window line of the bottom window without a true corner at D here, on the BMW versions there’s a bit of a kick up at D.

Therefore, these BMWs no longer have Hofmeister kinks and instead are Chevy Malibus.

404 - User No Longer Available > Textured Soy Protein 01/16/2020 at 17:51

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Why are you just posting BMWs? Those are clearly both BMWs.

(Disclaimer: I’m a real person, not an actor.)

Urambo Tauro > Textured Soy Protein 01/16/2020 at 23:57

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